Chuck Norris got elected for president, even though he didn't run for anything.
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Chuck Norris was banned from the Olympics because his mere presence is considered a performance-enhancing substance.
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There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
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The second hardest element in the universe is Chuck Norris.
The first only comes into existance when Chuck gets excited.
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Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
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Chuck Norris once squeezed an M&M so hard that it turned into a Skittle.
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If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win.
Forever.
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Latin insulted Chuck Norris.
It is now a dead language.
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Eminem says "I'm not afraid".
Chuck Norris says "I love the way you lie"
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Someone once broke into Chuck Norris' house and instead of stealing anything they gave Chuck Norris everything they owned.
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Chuck Norris uses gasoline as aftershave just for the pleasant tingling sensation.
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