Chuck Norris got elected for president, even though he didn't run for anything.
The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.
Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.
Kids dream about having superpowers. Superpowers dream about having Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris has only used the 'Total Gym' twice in his life. When his eyes are open - and when they are closed.
Yoda used to be 6 feet tall till he tried that Force crap on Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris plays Nazi Zombies it's the Zombies who build barriers.
Titanic crashed into Chuck Norris' cut out toe nail.
CBS hired Chuck Norris to replace Charlie Sheen, now the show is called Ten and half Men.
People have near-death experiences. Death has Near-Chuck-Norris experiences.
Chuck Norris once shot someone with a knife.