Chuck Norris doesn't need a stapler, he puts the paper between his fingers and they just stick.
Chuck Norris does not require food, drink, shelter, or sleep, only confirmed kills.
Before each filming of Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris is injected with fourteen times the lethal dose of elephant tranquilzer. This is, of course, to limit his strength and mobility, in an attempt to lower the fatality rate of the actors he fights.
Davie Jones is afraid of Chuck Norris' Locker.
When Chuck Norris walks into a room, the mice jump on chairs.
The Roswell UFO crashed because Chuck thought it was a frisbee.
Scientists did not in fact slipt the atom, Chuck Norris just roundhouse kicked it.
Chuck Norris uses 8'x10' sheets of plywood as toilet paper.
Chuck Norris can drive a car without gas... or an engine.
You don't leave a room, Chuck Norris throws you out.
The Reapers in the Mass Effect series were actually Chuck Norris' baby toys.