Chuck Norris has the right to keep and arm bears.
Chuck Norris not only speaks in the third person, he sees in the third person.
Most tough men eat nails for breakfast. Chuck Norris does all of his grocery shopping at Home Depot.
When Chuck Norris gets pulled over he read the officers his rights.
Chuck Norris watched the first season of "24" in 5 hours.
Chuck Norris can swim in an empty pool.
Barack Obama was elected president of the USA because Chuck Norris said so. He remind him of Trivette...
Chuck Norris has never received an electricity bill, he powers everything with his rage
Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.
Chuck Norris made Newton write 3 laws of physics just to break them... he was having a boring weekend.
Chuck Norris can make a robot bleed.