Chuck Norris' free advice is worth a fortune.
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Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died.
The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Chuck's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible.
All three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.
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Chuck Norris has counted to infinity.
Twice.
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Chuck Norris doesn't throw a baseball, it just leaves his hand cowering in fear.
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Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
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Hurricanes are really just Chuck Norris breathing into the rain.
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Chuck Norris does not smile. \r\nHe flexes his teeth.
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Time waits for no man.
Unless that man is Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris takes a meteor shower.
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Chuck Norris can cash two party, out of state checks with no ID, or else!
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Micheal Jordan to Chuck Norris:
I can spin a ball on my finger for over two hours.
Can you?
Chuck Norris: (laughs) How do you think the earth spins?
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