Chuck Norris' free advice is worth a fortune.
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Ali Baba said "Open sesame" to open the secret entrance to the treasure, but little did he know that saying "Open Chuck Norris" opens all doors.
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Cars were invented to have a faster way of fleeing from Chuck Norris.
Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris invented the car accident.
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Chuck Norris digs up gold - from silver linings.
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When Chuck Norris has a bone to pick, it's always the jawbone.
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“The Day the Earth Stood Still” is based off the one day in Earth’s history when Chuck Norris slept.
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Chuck Norris doesn't scroll with a mouse.
He uses a lion.
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Chuck Norris can make his own reflection vomit with fear.
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When the metal detector goes off at the airport, it is just verifying Chuck Norris walked through.
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He, who laughs last, laughs best.
He who laughs at Chuck Norris … dies.
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If Chuck Norris were to ever bungee jump, the earth would flinch.
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