Chuck Norris doesn't get stuck in traffic, traffic gets stuck in Chuck Norris.
Ozzy Osbourne once snorted a line of ants. Chuck Norris once snorted a line of bricks.
If you stab Chuck Norris, your knife will bleed.
In fourth grade, a teacher edited Chuck Norris's essay. Big mistake. You don't edit Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris edits you... with his fist.
This Christmas, Santa is sending a message to the naughty children to stop being bad. He stuffing their stocking with Chuck Norris!
Once Chuck Norris attempted to punch through a brick wall, but the brick wall crumbled in fear.
If Chuck Norris ran for president, the competition would drop out, and he would get infinite terms.
Although it is not common knowledge, there are actually three sides to the Force: the light side, the dark side, and Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris bowled a perfect game... While using a golf ball.
Chuck Norris favorite pick up line: ''now''
Chuck Norris can play the saxophone... while holding his breath.