Chuck Norris doesn't get stuck in traffic, traffic gets stuck in Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.
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If Chuck Norris ran for president, the competition would drop out, and he would get infinite terms.
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How long does it take Chuck Norris to get to Asia?
2 months...
How does he get there?
He walks.
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Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.
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Chuck Norris can tie his shoes with his feet.
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Suicide committed Chuck Norris.
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Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
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Chuck Norris can jump without leaving the ground.
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When Chuck Norris visits Egypt, the sand didn't burn his feet, his feet burnt the sand, hence the discovery of glass.
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Chuck Norris is the real man inside of Chucky.
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