Chuck Norris doesn't get stuck in traffic, traffic gets stuck in Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris's tombstone will say, "He's finally taking a nap, do not wake."
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Chuck Norris is another name for Terror.
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Chuck Norris has never taken a test, because no one questions Chuck Norris.
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In the first Jurassic Park movie, the Tyrannosaurus Rex wasn't chasing the jeep.
Chuck Norris was chasing the Tyrannosaurus and the jeep.
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Chuck Norris won the Tour De France on a stationary bike.
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The results of a recent Harris Poll on "what's scarier" forced the Discovery channel to cancel Shark week in lieu of Chuck Norris week.
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Ghosts are created when Chuck Norris kills people to fast for the grim reaper to prosses.
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The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris.
There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage.
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No one's afraid to criticize the US President, but no one even dares to say one bad thing about Chuck Norris...
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Racehorses have to pee like Chuck Norris.
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