30 lumberjacks once tried to cut off Chuck Norris's beard...
They were never seen again.
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Chuck Norris's Blood Can't be matched...
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Chuck Norris doesn't use his hand to catch bullets, he uses his mind.
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Chuck Norris does not wear a condom.
Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris rubs two pieces of fire together to make wood.
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Chuck Norris does not skip stones... he skips sheets of drywall.
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Chuck Norris doesn't do his taxes.....he just sends a blank tax form with his picture on it.
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Bill Gates owes Chuck Norris money.
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Chuck Norris is not impressed with your facts...
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People sell their souls to the devil.
The devil sells his soul to Chuck Norris.
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On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.
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