The Grimm Reaper lost his job the day Chuck Norris was born.
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A watched pot boils instantly for Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris douses all his food in diesel fuel and sets it on fire, 'cuz he likes it mildly spicy.
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Chuck Norris is not impressed with your facts...
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Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.
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Revenge is a dish best served...by Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can pick oranges from an apple tree and make the best lemonade youve ever tasted.
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In 1666, Chuck Norris caught the Plague.
The Plague learned its lesson, and has stayed away since then.
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When Chuck Norris falls into a puddle of water he doesn't get wet, the water gets Chuck Norris.
This is just a joke, we know Chuck Norris doesn't fall..ever
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Chuck Norris cuts paper by sticking his fingers out in a V and moving them up and down.
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Chuck Norris went for a swim in the ocean.
The sharks headed for land.
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