Chuck Norris doesn’t swim, we beats the water into submission.
The Grinch stole Christmas until Chuck Norris ordered him to return it.
Note to self: Don’t be the cashier to tell Chuck Norris his coupons have expired.
Chuck Norris can stop the music.
The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris. there were no survivors and the pilot episode tape has been burned.
Chuck norris recently received a restraining order barring him from getting closer then half a mile from Satan.
Chuck Norris doesn't expect the unexpected. He knows the unexpected.
Chuck Norris' Motto is: "The beard is mightier than the sword."
Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.