Chuck Norris doesn’t swim, we beats the water into submission.
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At museums Chuck Norris is allowed to touch the art.
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When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay:
"What is courage?" He received an A+ for turning in a blank page with only his name at the top.
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The only reason you woke up this morning is because Chuck Norris allowed you too.
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The Expendables 2 is actually a documentary film showing Chuck Norris killing people.
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Chuck Norris can arrive anywhere without actually leaving.
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Finally, they discovered real cause of Bruce Lee's death – extreme exhaustion from fight with Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris does not have to "Fight for his right to Party".
Parties have to fight for their right to Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris' guitar amp goes up to 12.
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Chuck Norris can paint himself into a corner and still get the job done.
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Chuck Norris tried to shave with Darth Vaders's light saber, but the light went out as soon as it realized Chuck Norris was there.
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