When somebody is all up in your face, just be glad that that someone is NOT Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't check the time - he decides it.
Every morning Chuck Norris eats a bowl of nails for Breakfast... without milk.
Rambo is simply Chuck Norris disguised as Sylvester Stalone playing tag.
Somebody said that Chuck sucks, since then their severed head with many foot marks have been found...
Chuck Norris doesn't lift weights he tells his muscles to get bigger.
Chuck Norris can skydive indoors.
Rules of fighting: 1) Don't bring a knife to a gun fight. 2) Don't bring a gun to a Chuck Norris fight.
In a fight between Batman and Darth Vader, the winner would be Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris graduated college in one hour.
If you say Chuck Norris' name in Mongolia, the people there will roundhouse kick you in his honor. Their kick will be followed by the REAL roundhouse delivered by none other than Norris himself.