When somebody is all up in your face, just be glad that that someone is NOT Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris actually died a while back.
Death just can't get the nerve to tell him.
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Chuck Norris doesn't shave, his beard grows to the perfect length and stops.
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Steve Austin had to be rebuilt as the Six Million Dollar Man after he looked Chuck Norris in the eye, shook his hand and then went weak at the knees.
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Chuck Norris once wrestled a thirty foot snake, and then he realized he was just masturbating.
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Q: How many Chuck Norris' does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: None. Chuck Norris can see in the dark.
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Once visiting Arizona, Chuck Norris spat on the ground.
The place is now known as the meteor crater.
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Chuck Norris' driver's license simply shows his shoe size.
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Chuck Norris once had to go to court...the judge got life in prison.
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Chuck Norris originally wrote the first dictionary.
The definition of each word is as follows - A swift roundhouse kick to the face.
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Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
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