The best kids jokes

Two children are in a doctor’s waiting room, and one of them is crying. "Why are you crying?" asked the other child. "I’m here for a blood test, and they’re going to cut my finger." When he heard this, the other child started to cry. "Why are you crying?" "I’m here for a urine test."
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More jokes about: doctor, kids
What do you call kids born in whorehouses? Brothel sprouts.
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More jokes about: kids
In the dim and distant past, when life's tempo wasn't so fast, Grandma used to rock and knit, Crochet, tat and babysit. When the kids were in a jam, they could always call on Gram. However, today she's in the gym exercising to keep slim. She's checking the web or surfing the net, sending some e-mail or placing a bet. Nothing seems to stop or block her, now that Grandma's off her rocker.
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More jokes about: gym, kids, memory, old people, time
Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson
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More jokes about: age, black humor, celebrity, kids
A father went to take his daughter from school. While waiting, he heard her talking with a classmate of hers "I worry so much-..! My dad works 16 hours a day so he can build a dream house for when I grow up. My mom spends her days cooking for me, making deserts and tiding my room so I can have fun. I worry. I’m so worried!" "With that kind of parents you have nothing to worry about," her friend told her. "Yeah, but what if... What if they... What if they... ESCAPE?"
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More jokes about: dad, kids, school, work
4-year-old: Why are you my dad? Me: Because I made you. 4: How? Me: ... 4: O.o Me: ... 4: O.O Me: With Legos.
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More jokes about: age, dad, kids
Which is the most confusing day in America? Father's day! 80% don't know whom to wish. Rest 20% are scared someone will come and wish them.
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More jokes about: ethnic, Fathers day, kids, sex
A little boy asks his Mum "why am I black and you are white ?" "Don't even ask," she replies "when I think back to that party... you are lucky that you not bark !"
Vote: has 54.70 % from 119 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black people, dirty, kids, party, white people
How should you treat a baby goat? Like a kid.
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More jokes about: animal, baby, kids
While having their evening dinner together, a little girl looked up at her father and asked, "Daddy, you're the boss in our family, right?" The father was very pleased to hear it and confidently replied, "Yes my little princess." The girl then continued, "That's because mommy put you in charge, right?"
Vote: has 54.59 % from 16 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dad, family, kids


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