The best jokes about life

Patient to doctor: "On the top of your prescription these words are printed: We treat; God Cures. If so, would I give the fee to you or shall I send it to God?" Doctor: "Pay me. I will send it."
Vote: has 75.97 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: doctor, god, life
A Rolls Royce pulls up in to an expensive restaurant. A sheik emerges, followed by a harem of women and a rooster. After ordering for himself and his harem, the sheik requests a basket of apples for the rooster. The rooster proceeds to eats three baskets of apples. The waiter asks the sheik about the voracious appetite of the rooster. The sheik explains, "A genie granted me three wishes. My first wish was to have an endless supply of money. My second wish was to have many beautiful women. And my third wish was to have an insatiable cock."
Vote: has 75.97 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, food, life, money, women
Life is like a box of chocolate. It doesn't last long for fat people.
Vote: has 75.96 % from 39 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
I would love to change the world, but they won't give me the source code.
Vote: has 75.92 % from 65 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: coding, computer, geek, IT, life
Kanye West compared himself to Michelangelo, Picasso, Walt Disney and Steve Jobs. Apparently none of them could sing, either.
Vote: has 75.75 % from 202 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, music
Is it true that 5 minutes of laugh prolongs your life by 5 minutes? It depends who you are laughing at – it may as well shorten it...
Vote: has 75.73 % from 94 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
The man pulled over to the side of the road when he saw the police lights in his rear view mirror. “How long have you been riding around without a tail light?” asked the officer. “Oh, no!” screamed the man, jumping out of the car. “Calm down, it isn’t that serious.” said the officer. “Wait’ll my family finds out.” “Where’s your family?” “They’re in the trailer that was hitched to the car!”
Vote: has 75.66 % from 49 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
Q: Why is life like a penis? A: Women make it hard!
Vote: has 75.62 % from 367 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, sex, women
Patient: Doc I keep on forgetting things. Doctor: Since when did you have these problems? Patient: What problems?
Vote: has 75.60 % from 54 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
The results of in-depth studies have determined that the most often used sexual position for marriedcouples is the "doggie position". The husband sits up and begs and the wife rolls over and plays dead.
Vote: has 75.58 % from 103 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, husband, life, marriage, sex