The best jokes about life

You know, I have Google+, Facebook, Twitter, Skype accounts... Man, and do you have life? OMG, No! Could you send me a link?
Vote: has 75.25 % from 278 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Facebook, IT, life, technology
Baby, baby, baby ooh! Mom: *walks in* Are you listening to Justin Bieber? Daughter: No, I'm watching porn. Mom: Oh, thank goodness.
Vote: has 75.23 % from 92 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, music, sex
Gordan Ramsey:Theres more smoke in this kitchen than snopp dogg tour bus.
Vote: has 75.19 % from 48 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: celebrity, food, life, music
A driver tucked a note under her windshield wiper and dashed off: "I've circled the block for 20 minutes. I'm late for an appointment and if I don't park here I'll lose my job. Forgive us our trespasses." Returning, she came back only to find a parking ticket and this note: "I've circled the block for 20 years, and if I don't give you a ticket, I'll lose my job... Lead us not into temptation."
Vote: has 75.00 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, life, time
Cool Morals: 1. Money is not everything. There's also MasterCard & Visa. 2. One should love animals. They are tasty too. 3. Save water. Drink beer. 4. Studying is healthy. So leave it for the sick. 5. Books are holy. So don't touch them. 6. Love your neighbor. But don't get caught. 7. Every one should marry because happiness is not the only thing in life...
Vote: has 74.97 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life
I took a day off from work to play golf. I was on the fourth hole, when I discovered a small frog sitting on the green. I paid it no attention until I heard, "Ribbit. 9-iron." That's curious, I thought, but decided to trust the frog. I pulled out a 9-iron and sunk a hole-in-one. Amazed, I picked up the frog and asked where we should go next. "Ribbit. Vegas." We went to Vegas, and I asked the frog what we should do first. "Ribbit. Roulette." We went up to the roulette table, and I won big. I took my earnings and got the best room in the hotel. I asked the frog if there was anything I could do to repay it. "Ribbit. Kiss me." I figured, what the hell, and I kissed the frog. It turned into a 15-year-old girl. That's how she ended up in my room, your Honor, and if I'm lying, my name's not R. Kelly. Tweet Share
Vote: has 74.97 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, animal, golf, life, work
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
Vote: has 74.97 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: husband, life, wife
A Jehovah's Witnesses knocked on my door yesterday, so I answered it and asked if he wanted to come in he said, "Yeah, okay." I said I'm just making a cup of tea do you want one? He said, "Yeah, sure." I said I've just made some toast do you want a slice? He said, "Yeah, why not." I then he sat down and I asked him, "So what now?" He said, "I don't know I've never got this far before!"
Vote: has 74.97 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, religious
If someone ever intimidates you, remember that they're 70% water. Are you scared of water? Well you should be. 400,000 people drown per year.
Vote: has 74.97 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, life
Chuck Norris can experience a once in a life time occurrence... twice.
Vote: has 74.94 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, life