The best jokes about life

Two entrepreneurs, Jack and John, decided to start a bungee-jumping business south of the border. They went to Casa del Sol, Mexico, built a huge platform, and opened for business. By noon the first day, they both noticed that while everyone was watching, no one was buying tickets. Jack told John to go up and jump, so everyone could see how much fun it was, and then they would buy tickets and try it. John jumped, almost reached the ground, and sprang back up. Jack saw that his shirt was torn and his hair was mussed. John came down again and sprang back up. This time he had several bruises and his clothes were ripped to shreds. The third time down and back up, and he had several open wounds, a broken arm, and was bruised over most of his body. Jack quickly raised John to the platform and asked him what in the world was going on. John replied, "I’m not sure. Do you know what 'pinata' means?"
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has 66.64 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: business, life, mexican
What do a gynecologist, and a pizza delivery guy have in common? They both can smell it, but they can't eat it!
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has 66.62 % from 91 votes. More jokes about: life, sex
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
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has 66.60 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: husband, life, wife
A preacher's wife goes to the butcher. The butcher asks if she'd like to try some damn ham. The preacher's wife is shocked. The butcher explains that "Dam Ham" is the brand name of the meat and shows her the packaging with the beaver and dam logo. That night, the preacher asks, "What's for dinner?" His wife says she bought some damn ham from the butcher. The preacher scolds his wife for using such language in their home. She explains the "Dam Ham brand name and their logo. At the dinner table, the preacher asks his 16-year-old son to pass him the "Dam Ham." The son replies, "I'll pass the damn ham if you pass me the muthaf**kin' mashed potatoes."
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has 66.60 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: food, life, wife
A milkman gets an order for 45 pints of milk. Puzzled, he decides to ask the customer if this is a mistake. When he knocks on the door, a woman comes out wearing just a bath towel, and she confirms that she wants 45 pints. "Milk baths are good for your skin," explains the woman. "Oh, OK," replies the milkman. "Do you need it pasteurized then?" "No," says the woman. "Up to my tits will be fine."
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has 66.60 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: life
I read that India launched a rocket to Mars the other day. That seems like a strange place to put a call center.
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has 66.60 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: life
Grandma: "Why is that dumb piece of cotton candy talking." Me: "Grandma, thats Nikki Minaj."
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has 66.60 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, life
Have you heard of the new Obama happy meal at Mcdonalds? It comes with a promise that you'll get a toy someday.
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has 66.60 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: food, life, political
That awkward moment when you're about to hug someone sexy as hell and then you hit the mirror.
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has 66.52 % from 131 votes. More jokes about: life, sex
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down.
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has 66.46 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: life
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