The best jokes about life

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
Vote: has 66.46 % from 23 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: husband, life, wife
The houseman invited over his boss and partners, for lunch. With them, his little 5year-old daughter was there. "Don’t you want to say the prayers before lunch, so Our Holly Father give us his blessings?," asks the father. "But... I don’t know what to say...," the little girl admits. "Just say what you heard your mommy say last time inside the kitchen!," said her mother to help her. And the girl: "Oh, God! Why in this life, my husband must invite all these people for lunch?"
Vote: has 66.46 % from 23 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: food, god, husband, kids, life
A milkman gets an order for 45 pints of milk. Puzzled, he decides to ask the customer if this is a mistake. When he knocks on the door, a woman comes out wearing just a bath towel, and she confirms that she wants 45 pints. "Milk baths are good for your skin," explains the woman. "Oh, OK," replies the milkman. "Do you need it pasteurized then?" "No," says the woman. "Up to my tits will be fine."
Vote: has 66.46 % from 23 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: life
How do you describe an angry potato? Boiling Mad.
Vote: has 66.46 % from 23 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: food, life
Q: Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? A: She will "let it go let it go".
Vote: has 66.46 % from 23 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: life, music
10 Facts About You: 1. You're reading this now. 2. You're realizing that this is a stupid fact. 4. You didn't notice I skipped number 3. 5. You're checking now. 6. You're smiling. 7. You're still reading this even though it is stupid. 9. You didn't realize I skipped number 8. 10. You're checking again and smiling because you fell for it again. 11. You're enjoying this. 12. You didn't realize I said 10 facts not 12.
Vote: has 66.46 % from 70 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: life
I like my girl to be Hannah on the streets but Miley in the sheets.
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: celebrity, life, music, women
What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half mast? They're hiring.
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: life
Q: How do you drown a hipster? A: In the mainstream.
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: death, hipster, life
The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Christmas, Chuck Norris, life


<<<47484950
More jokes →
Page 47 of 80.