The best jokes about life

Customer: "Waiter, this soup tastes funny." Waiter: "Funny? But then why aren’t you laughing?"
Vote:
has 44.24 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: food, life
The fastest dialog in the world: (WC door is opening) Man inside: Heyyy! Man outside: Sorryyy!
Vote:
has 43.73 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: life
Three men are sitting at a campfire telling stories about their great endeavors. The first man talked about how to sucked out the venom of a snake and sucked it up with 50 degree alcohol. The second man called it a circus trick as he has gotten 3 gunshots towards the chest and he but the guns in half. They looked at the third guy wanting to hear his story. Only to see him stroking his cock with the glowing hot coals.
Vote:
has 43.61 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, dirty, life, men
You ever accidentally go up to a real big fat person, and you accidentally ask them for a good place to eat? And they look at you and say they don't know. And you're looking at them, like, 'You do know. I bet if I follow you for an hour, we gonna be eatin'. '
Vote:
has 43.39 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: life
One night, there was a knock on my door... i open it and no one was there every night I would get the same knock and still no one was there... Untill the morning I was just making myself some tea as a person knocks on my door it was a black man he walk in and stole my tea .... i said to myself did he just mug me .... I still didn't know who was knocking on the doors at night Untill one night I opened my door and there was a floating mug I was still confused.
Vote:
has 43.39 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: knock-knock, life
A young accountant spends a week at his new office with the retiring accountant he is replacing. Each and every morning as the more experienced accountant begins the day, he opens his desk drawer, takes out a worn envelope, removes a yellowing sheet of paper, reads it, nods his head, looks around the room with renewed vigor, returns the envelope to the drawer, and then begins his day’s work. After he retires, the new accountant can hardly wait to read for himself the message contained in the envelope in the drawer, particularly since he feels so inadequate in replacing the far wiser and more highly esteemed accountant. Surely, he thinks to himself, it must contain the great secret to his success, a wondrous treasure of inspiration and motivation. His fingers tremble anxiously as he removes the mysterious envelope from the drawer and reads the following message: "Debits in the column toward the file cabinet. Credits in the column toward the window. Prefer Wraps and females who think realistically pick Wholemeal.”
Vote:
has 43.21 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: life
Three guys, stranded on a desert island, find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish. The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home. The second guy wishes the same. The third guy says "I’m lonely. I wish my friends were back here."
Vote:
has 42.26 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: desert island, friendship, genie, life
Q: What bounces and makes kids cry? A: My donation cheque to Children in Need.
Vote:
has 42.03 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: kids, life
Q: Why did Mexico send only a couple thousand Mexicans to fight in the Alamo? A: Because they only had 4 trucks.
Vote:
has 41.91 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: life, mexican
How do you caculate the population of Russia? You roll a bottle of vodka down the street.
Vote:
has 41.91 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, life
<<<75767778
More jokes →
Page 75 of 81.