One man (lets call him Johnny) came to gun shop. J(ohnny):I want a pistol S(alesman):Choose from this wall (points at wall full of pistols) J: (points at biggest pistol) I want this, S: An .44 Magnum? And for what purpose? J: For shooting cans. S: (points on smaller handgun) For shooting cans is the best this one. J: (points again on .44) No, I want this one. S: And what cans will you shoot at? J: Um...Mexi-cans, Portori-cans, Afri-cans...
Why do men like smart women? Opposites attract.
How do men exercise on the beach? By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.
Men are like.....Coffee The best ones are rich, warm, and can keep you up all night long.
Women dream of world peace, a safe environment, and eliminating hunger. What do men dream of? Being stuck in an elevator with the Doublemint twins.
"What is the thickest book in the world? What Men Think They Know About Women."
What is a man's idea of helping with housework? Lifting his leg so you can vacuum.
Q. Why did the woman bury her husband 12 feet under? A. Because deep down he's a good person.
Q. Why do men name their penises? A. Because they don't want ninety per cent of their decisions made by a perfect stranger.
Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are beautiful.