50Cent used to be called DollarBill but Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked him to the face and now he's half the man he used to be.
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Chuck Norris can play a whole note in 3/4 time.
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Chuck Norris can watch music.
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Q: What do Blondes say after sex?
A1: Thanks Guys.
A2: Are you boys all in the same band?
A3: Do you guys all play for the Green Bay Packers?
Ozzy Osbourne once snorted a line of ants.
Chuck Norris once snorted a line of bricks.
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What did the black epileptic have written on his t-shirt?
"Help I'm not break dancing"
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Kanye West interupted Chuck Norris and became Kanye East.
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The Beatles' song "HELP" was written after they met Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can make a rap video without booties and cars.
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One Sunday afternoon an older couple was listening to a holy station on the radio.
They were about 98 years old and so frail, they couldn't walk to church.
The preacher said, ''If you put one hand on the radio and one hand on whatever you want healed I will heal it for you.''
So the old woman put one hand on the radio and one hand on her heart.
The old man tried to not let the old woman see but he put one hand on the radio and one hand on his penis.
The old woman looked over and said, ''He said he could heal, not raise the dead!''
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