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One morning while his wife was making breakfast, a man walked up to her and gave her a healthy pinch on her butt. He said to her, "If you firmed up your butt we could get rid of your girdle." The wife was angry but said nothing. The next morning her husband pinched her breast and said, "If you firmed these up we could get rid of your bra." The wife grabbed her husband's penis and replied, "and if you firmed this up we could get rid of the mailman, the gardener, the pool man, and your brother!"
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has 82.28 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: husband, men, sex, wife
They have traced the Gay Gene all the way back to the time of the Dinosaurs. They found two distinct species. They have named them Lickalotapus and Megasoreass.
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has 62.50 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: dinosaur, gay, history, science, time
Yo mama so fat, the only way scientists found out about space because you could see her from Earth.
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has 57.17 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: fat, science, Yo mama
Chuck Norris can make love to a girl so hard and fast it inspired a reality tv series. We know it as Forged in the fire.
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has 61.63 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, sex, women
Q: If a white baby grows wings and goes to heaven what do you call it? A: A Angel. Q: If a black baby grows wings and goes to heaven what do you call it? A: A Bat.
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has 36.11 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist, white people
Knock-knock Who's there? Fuck. Fuck who? You.
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has 68.26 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: knock-knock, vulgar
Grass is green, trees are greener. When I think of you, I play with my wiener.
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has 65.91 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: dirty, masturbation, poems
Q: Why did two women walk into a saloon pointing bananas at people and shouting: "GIVE US YER LOOT!" A: They were both blonds.
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has 63.00 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: blonde, money, stupid
A duck, a pigeon, and a chicken all walk into a courtroom... The judge asked the duck, "What is your crime?" The duck responds, "I was blowing bubbles in front of City Hall." The judge says, "There's no crime committed here, you're free to go." The judge then asks the pigeon, "What is your crime?" The pigeon responds, "I was also blowing bubbles in front of City Hall." The judge looks a little confused but finally says, "There's no crime committed here, you're also free to go." Lastly, the chicken walks up to the judge, and the judge asks, "What is your crime?" The chicken, first looking back at the pigeon and the duck, then turning to the judge says, "I'm bubbles."
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has 79.06 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, dirty, duck, sex
Little Johnny, "Why are you so fat?" Little Billy, "Cause Every time I fuck ur mom she gives me a doughnut."
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has 56.65 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: dirty, little Johnny, sex, vulgar, Yo mama

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