The best sex jokes

Q: How do you make four old ladies say "FUCK!"? A: Get a fifth one to yell "BINGO!"
Vote: has 74.48 % from 610 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: sex
One day a girl was with her mom in the park and saw two teens having sex on the bench. The little girl asked her mom, "Mommy, what are they doing?" The mom was blushing and replied, "Oh their making cakes." The next day the girl and the mom went to the zoo and saw two monkey having sex. The little girl asked again, "Mommy, what are they doing?" Again the mother replied, "Oh their making cakes." The next day, the little girl confronted her mom, "Mommy, I know you and daddy we’re making cakes last night." The mom was frightened and asked, "How did you know?" The little girl replied, "I licked the icing off the couch! It was good too!"
Vote: has 74.42 % from 324 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: sex
My husband told me to find him the best penis enlargement product. So I gave him a magnifying glass!
Vote: has 74.37 % from 632 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: husband, sex
The famous sex therapist was on the radio taking questions when a caller asked, ‘Doctor, why do men always want to marry a virgin?’ To which the doctor responded, ‘To avoid criticism.’
Vote: has 74.32 % from 369 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: sex
A little boy wakes up in the middle of the night and walks into his parents room and sees them having sex. The little boy, traumatized, runs out of the room crying. "You should go check on him, thats really going to be something you need to explain," said the mother. The father laughed it off with a traditional "he will get over it," and continued to chuckle about the whole situation. After some additional prodding from the mother the father agrees to go talk to the little boy. As he is walking down the hallway to his sons room he hears an empty thumping sound coming from his sons room. Thump - Thump - squish - Thump- Thump. The father, very confused, slams the door open and sees his son balls deep, pounding the shit out of his grandmothers asshole. Just really going to town on it. The father screams "What the hell are you doing?" The boy replies, "It's not so funny when its your mom, is it?"
Vote: has 74.29 % from 335 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dad, family, sex
Q: Why do men pay more for car insurance? A: Women don't get blow jobs while they're driving.
Vote: has 74.28 % from 51 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: car, money, sex, work
Q. Difference between a man buying a lottery ticket and a man fighting with his wife... A. A man has a chance at winning at the lottery.
Vote: has 74.26 % from 267 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: sex
Girl, you should sell hotdogs, because you already know how to make a wiener stand!
Vote: has 74.20 % from 46 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, dirty, flirt, food, sex
Wishing to prove to his wife that he loved her for more than sex, the young man bought her a lovely bouquet of roses. Despite his good intentions, however, the devoted husband received a suspicious look when he handed her the flowers. "I suppose," she said, "that now you expect me to spend the weekend on my back with my legs spread." "Why?" said the young man. "Don't we have a vase?"
Vote: has 74.15 % from 495 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: love, sex, wife
The lesbians next door bought me a Rolex for my birthday. I think they misunderstood when I said I wanna watch...
Vote: has 74.09 % from 580 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: birthday, communication, dirty, lesbian, sex


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