The best sex jokes

Valentines Day is the day that the "V" and "D" come together.
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has 65.19 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex, Valentines day
Q: What's the worst part about sex? A: When they wake up!
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has 65.19 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: mean, sex
AT WORK, Michael: Why you white guys always so happy? Casey: Because I make love to my wife every morning before work. Michael: Say whaaat? You get her to make love EVERY morning? How do you do that? Casey: It's easy, I just say a poem, women love poems and will fall for them all the time. Michael: Ok, what kind of poem can you say to make her make love every morning? Casey: I say, "blonde hair, blonde hair, eyes of blue, I love to wake up and make love to you. Michael: HAHAAA she falls for that? Casey: yes you should try it. NEXT DAY TYRONE COMES IN WITH BLACK EYE FAT LIP AND A TOOTH MISSING. Casey: What happened to you? Michael: Well, I said a poem to my wife and she didn't like it. Casey: She didn't like it? What did you say? Michael: Nappy head, nappy head, eyes like a frog, if I could roll your fat ass over I would do you like a dog.
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has 65.19 % from 334 votes. More jokes about: black people, poems, sex, white people
Did I tell you the joke about my dick? Never mind its too long.
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has 65.18 % from 337 votes. More jokes about: sex
A man limps into a bar with a cane and alligator. The bartender stops him and says "Hold on a second here - you can't bring that animal in here, they aren't allowed!" So the man says, "But my gator here does a really cool trick..." The bartender says "Well then, lets see!" So the man whips out his dick and shoves it in the gators mouth. He then takes his cane and starts bashing the gator in the head with it. A crowd gathers around and everyone is astonished when he pulls out his dick without a single scratch. He looks around at the crowd and says, "Does anyone else want to try?" An old lady raises her hand and says..."Sure, but don't hit me with that stick."
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has 65.14 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, bar, sex
Q: What's the difference between a hooker and a drug dealer? A: A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
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has 65.04 % from 163 votes. More jokes about: drug, sex
A husband and wife are walking down the street when a beautiful young woman blows the husband a kiss. ‘I met her last week,’ explains the husband. ‘Professionally of course.’ The wife replies, ‘Which profession? Yours or hers?’
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has 65.01 % from 93 votes. More jokes about: sex
What did Adam say to Eve? ‘Stand back! I don’t know how big this thing gets!’
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has 65.00 % from 80 votes. More jokes about: sex
Q: Why did dinosaurs have sex under water? A: You try to keep five hundred pounds of pussy wet!
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has 64.98 % from 109 votes. More jokes about: dinosaur, sex
Robinson came home in great excitement and said to his wife, “You’ll never believe it, dear, but I’ve discovered an entirely new position for lovemaking.” “Really,” said Mrs. Robinson, interested at once. “What is it?” “Back to back.” “But that’s crazy. We can’t do anything back to back.” “Yes we can. I’ve persuaded another couple to help out.”
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has 64.93 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: dirty, love, sex, wife
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