The best sex jokes

The three words most hated by men during sex: ‘Are you done?’ The three words most hated by women during sex, ‘Honey, I’m home!’
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has 64.50 % from 148 votes. More jokes about: sex
A man and woman were celebrating their 50 year anniversary. That night, the woman comes out of the bathroom completely naked and looks at her husband who is already in bed. She says, "Honey, 50 years ago tonight, when I came out of the bathroom with no clothes on, what were you thinking?" He said, "I was thinking that I wanted to suck your titties dry and fuck you until you couldn’t think straight." She smiled at him and said, "So what are you thinking now?" He said, "I think I did a pretty good job!"
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has 64.28 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: anniversary, husband, marriage, sex, time
I heard that the missionary position helps men to work out the chest and triceps... do you wanna help me verify this?
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has 64.28 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: fitness, flirt, sex
Q. How do you know when you are getting old? A. When you start having dry dreams and wet farts.
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has 64.23 % from 289 votes. More jokes about: age, fart, sex
Q: Why did dinosaurs have sex under water? A: You try to keep five hundred pounds of pussy wet!
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has 64.22 % from 119 votes. More jokes about: dinosaur, sex
My girlfriend has 206 bones in her body. Now 207. Now 206. Now 207. Now 206. Now 207...
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has 64.22 % from 502 votes. More jokes about: sex
Holy mother, full of grace Bless my boyfriend's gorgeous face Bless his hair that tends to curl Keep him safe from all the girls Bless his arms that are so strong Keep his hands where they belong Bless his dick, the one i sucked Bless the bed, in which we fucked And if my Mom happened to walk in Bless the shit I'd be in.
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has 64.21 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: poems, sex, vulgar
A couple have been dating for a few weeks, but the guy has been afraid of making advances because he thinks his penis is on the small side. Finally, he gets up his courage and takes her down lovers’ lane. While they’re kissing, he opens his trouser zip and guides her hand onto his organ. ‘No thanks,’ says the girl. ‘I don’t smoke.’
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has 64.19 % from 122 votes. More jokes about: sex
What did the vagina say to the penis. So do you cum here often.
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has 64.09 % from 234 votes. More jokes about: sex
There are 10 types of people in the world. Those who understand binary and those who have regular sex.
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has 64.05 % from 106 votes. More jokes about: IT, sex
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