Q: What' is Hillary Clinton favorite movies? A: Kill BILL 1 and 2.
A beautiful woman sits next to a drunk in a bar. He turns to her and says, ‘Hey, honey. How about you and me getting it on? I’ve got a couple of pounds and it looks like you could use the money.’ The woman turns to him and says, ‘What makes you think I charge by the inch?’
The average speed of ejaculation is 45km/h, which is probably why I was arrested for doing it outside a school.
What do you call men who use the pull out method? Fathers.
Roses are red lemons are sour. Open your legs and give me an hour.
One day a women walks into work in a short skirt. As she’s walking to her desk she gets stopped by a co-worker, who says, “Your hair smells really nice today.” She grimaces and stomps into her manager’s office. She says,”I want to file a sexual harassment complaint!” and then relates what happened. The manager says, “What’s wrong with him complimenting how your hair smells?” Furious, she snarls, “He’s a midget!”
A sexology professor announced that if any man over 50 eats 2 or 3 dates with a raw garlic clove he never fails in sex problems. This prescription makes his dick strong and heathy. There is only one side effect. That diet causes he blows many farts daily!
I wish my girlfriend had warned me about the ceiling mirror in her bedroom. I lay down ready for her, then ran out screaming – I’d looked up and thought I was being attacked by a naked skydiver.
Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute? A: Clothes.
Q: Why don't Canadians have group sex? A: Too many thank-you letters to write afterwards.