The best sex jokes

Smoke a smoke Not a butt Fuck a virgin Not a slut.
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has 57.76 % from 136 votes. More jokes about: poems, sex, vulgar, weed
Why are guys like microwavable meals? They’re both done in 30 seconds.
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has 57.69 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: sex
Once a blonde wanted to go to her boyfriend's home. Her mom advised her: "My sweet whenever your boy friend wanted to touch your pants tell him there is a hot oven so your hand will burn." Next day her mom asked her daughter: "Had you a good day?" The blonde answered: "It was the best day in my life because when my boyfriend touched my pants I told him: 'There is a hot oven and your hand would damage!' But he urged me that I've one hot dog and I wanna to cook it for several times he put his hot dog in my pants and then he put it in my mouth for confident whether it has been cooked or not."
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has 57.66 % from 115 votes. More jokes about: blonde, dirty, relationship, sex, stupid
Q:Why do women like to have sex with the lights off? A:They can't stand to see a man have a good time!
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has 57.64 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: sex
I just had an argument with a girl I know. She was saying how that it's unfair that if a guy fucks a different girl every week, he's a legend, but if a girl fucks just two guys in a year, she's a slut. So in response, I told her that if a key opens lots of locks, then it's a master key. But if a lock is opened by lots of keys, then it's a shitty lock. That shut her up.
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has 57.64 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: communication, mean, men, sex, women
What happens when a dwarf runs between a girls legs? He gets a clit around the head and a flap on the face.
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has 57.54 % from 86 votes. More jokes about: sex
Man to woman: ‘Tell me, after having sex do you ever smoke?’ Woman: ‘I’ve never looked.’
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has 57.40 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: sex
What is that insensitive bit at the base of the penis called? The man.
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has 57.35 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: men, sex
One weekend, the husband is in the bathroom shaving when the kid he hired to mow his lawn, a local kid named Bubba, comes in to pee. The husband slyly looks over and is shocked at how immensely endowed Bubba is. He can't help himself, and asks Bubba what his secret is. "Well," says Bubba, "every night before I climb into bed with a girl, I whack my penis on the bedpost three times. It works, and it sure impresses the girls!" The husband was excited at this easy suggestion and decided to try it that very night. So before climbing into bed with his wife, he took out his penis and whacked it three times on the bedpost. His wife, half-asleep, said, "Bubba? Is that you?"
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has 57.29 % from 180 votes. More jokes about: husband, kids, marriage, sex
A redneck family shares one vehicle, the daughter asks her dad for the truck. The father says "okay, you know what to do." Then continues to lower his pants, the daughter says "daddy why's there shit on your dick." The father then replies "ohhhh, that's right honey, your brother has the truck."
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has 57.27 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: car, disgusting, family, redneck, sex
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