The best sex jokes

Two friends who had not seen each other for awhile met at a bar. "Hey, your wife just had a birthday recently, didn't she? Did you get her anything special?" "Yeah, I got her a pair of slippers and a dildo." "A pair of slippers and a dildo?" "Yeah, I said 'If you don't like the slippers, you can go fuck yourself.' "
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has 54.49 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: bar, birthday, dirty, friendship, sex
One night a man and woman went to his house to have sex when he stopped her to say "I still live with my parents and me and my brother share bunk beds so if you want to change positions say "lettuce" and if you want to go faster say "tomatos" So they were getting it on and she was screaming "lettuce, lettuce, tomatos, lettuce, tomatos, tomatos" Suddenly the younger brother (on the bottom bunk) said "Could you stop making sandwiches your getting mayonase on me"!
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has 54.46 % from 87 votes. More jokes about: dirty, food, sex
There is nothing wrong with sex on TV – as long as you don’t fall off.
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has 54.44 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: sex
Why pay $5 at Subway when you can get this footlong for free?
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has 54.44 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: dirty, flirt, food, money, sex
Two men were talking: First : "Can U put the word 'penis' in a sentence?" Second: "Yo mama's pussy."
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has 54.41 % from 111 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, sex, vulgar, Yo mama
Want to make a porno? We don't have to tape it.
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has 54.31 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: dirty, flirt, sex
Yo momma's clitoris is as long as my dick.
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has 54.20 % from 67 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex, Yo mama
What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking? Slow down. And possibly use a lubricant.
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has 54.18 % from 84 votes. More jokes about: sex
If you're under the age of 25 and you think your life sucks then you better brace yourself.... Life has only given you the TIP of its Dildo.
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has 54.13 % from 134 votes. More jokes about: age, life, sex
Q. How can you tell a head nurse? A. She's the one with the dirty knees!
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has 54.01 % from 74 votes. More jokes about: sex
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