A kid came home from school and asked his dad, "Dad, I heard some kids talking about a thing called a vagina. What is a vagina, and what does it look like?"
"Well, son, before sex it looks like a beautiful unopened rose."
"Wow, what does it look like after sex?"
"Well, son, have you ever seen a bulldog eating mayonaise?"
We're like hot chocolate and marshmallows...
You're hot and I wanna be on top of you.
If you're under the age of 25 and you think your life sucks then you better brace yourself....
Life has only given you the TIP of its Dildo.
Q. How can you tell a head nurse?
A. She's the one with the dirty knees!
A newly-wed couple didn’t know the difference between putty and Vaseline.
A week after the marriage all their windows fell out.
Which was the least of their worries.
Q: Whats the definition of vagina?
A: The box a penis comes in.
Yo mama so fat when you have sex with her you have to slap her stomach and ride the wave in.
Wife comes back from the doctor and says to her husband:
Honey, I have a sad news - a gynecologist told me not have sex for a three weeks...
Husband:
And what the dentist said?
A German woman is walking down the street.
Eleven blonde guys walk up and attack her.
She screams, "Nein!, Nein"
So two guys walk away.
Are you a mum?
I am not a dad!
Maybe you could help me with that!