The best sex jokes

This 12 year old boy was in bed when he heard his mother moaning. He decided that he'd go see whats wrong with her. When he looked in his mothers room he saw that she was laying on her bed naked and rubbing herself and saying"I need a man, I need a man" So this quite a few times and then one night he heard his mother again, but this time her moaning sounded different, so he went to go check it out, this time instead of seeing his mother alone, he sees his mother in bed with a man. So the boy runs back to his room, strips all his clothes off, jumps on the bed and starts rubbing himself while saying "I need a bike, I need a bike"!!!!!
Vote: has 52.48 % from 172 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, masturbation, sex
Are you a mum? I am not a dad! Maybe you could help me with that!
Vote: has 52.41 % from 33 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: family, flirt, sex
Hi, my name is "Milk." I'll do your body good.
Vote: has 52.41 % from 33 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, flirt, health, sex
So this blonde woman walks into a shop and asks the owner "Have you got a phone I can borrow as I have a bit of money and I want to call my mom." The owner says "yes" and takes her to the back of the room as he realized she was a blonde so he wanted a blowjob. So they go in the back of the room and the guy took his pants off and took out his penis. So the woman gave him the money and she put her mouth on his penis and shouted: "HEY MOM ARE YOU IN THERE!"
Vote: has 52.38 % from 28 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: blonde, money, phone, sex, stupid
Why is sex like a game of bridge? You don’t need a partner if you’ve got a good hand.
Vote: has 52.23 % from 45 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: sex
Yo' Mama is so skanky, her idea of safe sex is to lock the car doors.
Vote: has 52.18 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: car, sex, Yo mama
The sex was so good that even the neighbors had a cigarette.
Vote: has 52.12 % from 137 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: sex
A father notices his young son staring at something on the ground. The father approaches his son and asks what he's looking at. The boy says that he sees two daddy long legs on top of each other, and asks what they're doing. They father replies that the two spiders are having sex. It's a completely natural thing that a mommy and daddy do when they love each other. The son then asks if one is a daddy long leg and the other is a mommy long leg. The father says that they're both daddy long legs. The son stomps on them, killing them. The father asks why he did that. The boy replies "I don't want any of that faggot-ass shit in my yard."
Vote: has 52.05 % from 40 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, family, sex, vulgar
How did Pinocchio find out he was made of wood? When his hand caught fire.
Vote: has 51.63 % from 86 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: sex
Yo momma so fat when I crawl in her pussy I can't find my way out.
Vote: has 51.61 % from 25 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, fat, insulting, sex, Yo mama


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