The best sex jokes

Yo' Mama is so skanky, her idea of safe sex is to lock the car doors.
Vote: has 49.51 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, sex, Yo mama
I'm like Domino's Pizza. If I don't come in 30 minutes, the next one is free.
Vote: has 49.51 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: business, flirt, food, money, sex
What does a nigger do after sex? 25 years to life.
Vote: has 49.39 % from 84 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, prison, racist, sex, time
What happened when the chef got his hand caught in the dishwasher? They both got fired.
Vote: has 49.30 % from 51 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Hey! I don't have a mom, me and my dad share yours.
Vote: has 49.30 % from 51 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Nigel, a college student is talking to a friend. ‘Y’ know,’ he says. ‘I think my room-mate is queer.’ ‘Why d’you say that?’ asks the student. ‘Well,’ replies Nigel. ‘Every time I kiss him goodnight he shuts his eyes.’
Vote: has 49.20 % from 75 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Murphy the bus driver is sitting in his cab when his supervisor comes along. ‘Hello, Murphy,’ he says. ‘What time did you pull out this morning?’ ‘I didn’t,’ replies Murphy. ‘And I’ve been worrying about it all day.’
Vote: has 49.00 % from 44 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Valentines Slogans 10. I admire your strength, I admire your spunk, But the thing I like best, is getting you drunk. 9. Our love will never become cold and hollow, Unless, one day, you refuse to swallow. 8. I bought this Valentine's card at the store, In hopes that, later, you'd be my whore. 7. This feels so good, it feels so right, I just wish it wasn't $250 a night. 6. You're a woman of style, you're a woman of class, Especially when I'm spanking, your big-round-fat ass. 5. Before I met you, my heart was so famished, But now I'm fulfilled. . . SO MAKE ME A SAMICH!!! 4. Through all the things that came to pass, Our love has grown. . . but so's your ass. 3. You're a honey. . . and you're a cutie, I just wished you had J-Lo's "booty". 2. I don't wanna be sappy or silly or corny, So right to the point, let's do it, I'm horny! 1. If you think that hickey looks like a blister. You should check out the one that I gave to your sister!
Vote: has 48.79 % from 28 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, love, money, sex, Valentines day
Yo moma so fat that when I tried to have sex with her I burned my ass off the lightbulb.
Vote: has 48.79 % from 28 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fat, insulting, light bulb, sex, Yo mama
‘I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.’ Steve Martin
Vote: has 48.67 % from 72 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex