I tried some of that aphrodisiac rhino horn and it really worked.
I’m really beginning to fancy those rhinos now.
Ted and Julie go to bed with each other for the first time.
Julie: "I should warn you, Ted -- I've got acute angina."
Ted: "Your breasts aren't bad either."
Why did the Irishman wear two condoms?
To be sure, to be sure.
Monday – a very, very, good day! The leader’s daughter lost. We found her and all of us made sex with her.
Tuesday – a very, very, good day! The leader's wife lost. We found her and all of us made sex with her.
Wednesday – a very, very, very, very, very, very, bad day! ... I lost! … Now they're looking for me.
What's worse than finding a dead baby on your pillow in the morning?
Realizing you were drunk and made love to it the night before.
Q: What’s so good in f***ing twenty six year olds?
A: That they are twenty…
What’s the definition of a Yankee?
Same thing as a ‘quickie’ but you do it yourself.
Q: What have condoms and tires in common?
A: Good year.
What is the difference between a joystick and a man's d**k?
A joystick does its job.
Q: Chuck Norris invented the internet?
A: Just so he had a place to store his porn.
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