Q: How do you know a gay guy has farted? A: He needs to change his pants afterward.
A hippie walks on a bus and sees a nun. Being the straight forward kind of guy he is, he says "Hey baby, want to have sex?" The nun says "God no!" so she gets off the bus angry. When the hippie is about to get off the bus, the bus driver asks him "Hey man. you see that graveyard across the street?" The hippie go's "yeah I see it, what about it?" "well every Tuesday night at 8:30. the nun go's to the top of the hill to pray. If you dress up as a ghost, and tell her to have sex with you, she'll have too" The hippie replied "sweet!" So Tuesday night comes and the hippie has a ghost costume, 8:30 comes and here comes the nun. The hippie pops out and says "I am the ghost of a man buried here, and I command you to have sex with me!" The nun go's "Well... ok, but I have a virgins aspect so it has to be oral" So the nun and the hippie have oral sex and the hippie runs away and says "Ha, ha I was actually the hippie" and the nun said "Ha, ha I'm actually the bus driver!"
What do you say to a virgin? Thanks for nothing!
My doctor examined my testicles for me and found two small lumps. Luckily it turned out they were my testicles.
Roses are red violets are blue, I have never tried So can I stick it up you?
‘He had ambitions at one time to become a sex maniac, but he failed his practical.’ Les Dawson
What's the difference between a dead baby and a table? You can't fuck a table.
A man goes to the doctor and says "I need birth control for my 10 year old daughter" The doctor replies "She's 10 years old and sexually active?" The man says" Active? Hell no! Most of the time se just lies there and cries."
What does a nigger do after sex? 25 years to life.
What did the Irish spinster keep saying in her prayers? ‘Good Lord, please have Murphy on me…’