The best sex jokes

Three prisoners are locked in a cell. One takes out a harmonica and says, ‘At least I can play a little music and pass the time.’ The second prisoner pull out a pack of cards and says, ‘We can play games too.’ The third man pulls out a packet of tampons. ‘Those aren’t much use,’ says the first prisoner. ‘Yes they are,’ says the third prisoner. ‘On the packet it says we can use them to swim, play tennis and ski.’
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has 41.90 % from 87 votes. More jokes about: sex
Q: What does a blond man do at 03.00 in the night naked at the balcony? A: The blond girl told him to come outside
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has 41.85 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: blonde, sex, time
I'm no weather man, but you can expect more than a few inches tonight.
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has 41.54 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: dirty, flirt, sex, weather
Q. What do you call two lesbians with their period? A. Finger painting.
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has 41.51 % from 208 votes. More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, lesbian, sex
‘Bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.’ Rodney Dangerfield
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has 41.18 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: sex
Your mama is so stupid, when she lost her dildo she called the cops to look for it.
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has 41.18 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: cop, dirty, sex, stupid, Yo mama
Q: Chuck Norris invented the internet? A: Just so he had a place to store his porn.
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has 41.13 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, dirty, internet, sex
Monday – a very, very, good day! The leader’s daughter lost. We found her and all of us made sex with her. Tuesday – a very, very, good day! The leader's wife lost. We found her and all of us made sex with her. Wednesday – a very, very, very, very, very, very, bad day! ... I lost! … Now they're looking for me.
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has 40.92 % from 204 votes. More jokes about: dirty, sex, wife
One day Pepito was having a shower with his father when he saw his fathers penis. He asked his father what it was and his father replied "this is my racing car". The next night Pepito heard moaning in his parents room, being curious he peeped in to see what was happening. He then saw his father on top of his mother, while looking his father saw him and told him to go to his room. "OK, but I'm not sure you're driving that racing car properly" replied Pepito.
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has 40.87 % from 78 votes. More jokes about: car, driving, kids, sex
Why did the Irishman wear two condoms? To be sure, to be sure.
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has 40.61 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: sex
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