My wife is so kinky, when she was born, the doctor slapped her bottom to make her cry, and she said "Don't forget to pull my hair" I accidentally swallowed some WhiteOut last night. Woke up with a massive correction.
Men are like vacations – they never seem to be long enough.
I haven’t been the same since my testicles dropped. Mind you, I was hanging from a tree by them at the time.
My girlfriend used to give amazing blow jobs, but lately they haven't been so great - they are starting to hurt me now since her baby teeth started growing in.
I’m a very giving lover – I give Green Shield Stamps.
John Leslie has been accused of raping a disabled black girl on Blue Peter. He blamed it on dyslexia & said he thought the script said, use sticky black spastic.
Q: Why do black women lose their hair at an early age? A: From all of the hair pulling during rape.
What is special about a dead baby over all other forms of life? You can achieve deep throat from whichever way you enter.
My girlfriend used to fake foreplay. A man falls asleep on a beach and gets severe sunburn. He’s rushed to hospital by his wife
A ship with 30 sailors and one woman strands on a desert island. After one month the woman says: "I can not proceed in this way." And she suicides herself. After another month, the sailors say: "We can not proceed in this way." And they bury the woman. The next month, the sailors say: "We can not proceed in this way." And they dig up the woman.