My wife is so kinky, when she was born, the doctor slapped her bottom to make her cry, and she said "Don't forget to pull my hair" I accidentally swallowed some WhiteOut last night. Woke up with a massive correction.
how come blondes don't wear tampons? so their crabs don't go bungie jumping.
I’m not cheap, but I am on special this week.
Q: What's the hardest thing about a sex change from a man to a woman? A: Inserting the anchovies
‘Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats, then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.’ Fred Allen
A homo went to Denmark to have a sex change operation performed. When 'SHE' returned, a friend asked, "How did it go?" "Oh awful, just awful!" she replied. "What was so awful?" asked the friend, "Did it hurt a lot when they removed the extra parts?" "Oh no," she replied, "That wasn't bad at all." "Well, did it hurt when they put in the silicone implants?" the friend asked. "Oh no, that wasn't bad either!" she replied. "Well then," asked the friend, "What was so awful?" "It was when they cut a hole in my head and took out half my brain!"
‘I recently sold the rights of my love life to Parker brothers, they’re going to turn it into a game.’ Woody Allen
Jones aside. ‘You’re in perfect health,’ he says. ‘Your wife didn’t give me an erection, either.’
Men are like vacations – they never seem to be long enough.
Man cannot live on bread alone – he needs a bit of crumpet too.