The best sport jokes

Peter: Why was the Olympian not able to listen to music? Matthew: Why? Peter: Because he broke the record!
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has 73.48 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: athlete, music, sport
Chuck Norris won gold for sitting in the crowd at the olympics.
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has 73.29 % from 322 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, sport
Three heavyweight men; an American, and an English man and a sumo wrestler were going to commit suicide by jumping of the top of a building. The American jumped off and shouted "God save America!" The English man jumped off and shouted "God Save The Queen!" The Sumo wrestler jumped off and shouted "God save the person who I land on!''
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has 73.27 % from 346 votes. More jokes about: god, sport
I walked in on my girlfriend having sex with her fitness trainer. Me: "Okay, this isn't working out."
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has 73.13 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: love, sex, sport
Q: Did you hear about the race between the lettuce and the tomato? A: The lettuce was a "head" and the tomato was trying to "ketchup"!
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has 73.08 % from 210 votes. More jokes about: food, sport
A Scottish man was at a baseball game. It was the first time he had ever seen the sport so he sat quietly. The first batter approached the plate, took a few swings and then hit a double. Everyone was on their feet screaming “Run, run!” This happened two more times, with a single and a triple. The Scottish man was now excited and ready to get into the game. The next batter came up and four balls went by. The umpire called “walk” and the batter started on a slow trot to first. The Scotsman, extremely excited now, stood up and screamed, “R-R-Run ye ba$$tarrd, rrrun!” Everyone around him started laughing so the Scotsman, extremely embarrassed, sat back down. The fan sitting next to the Scotsman noticed his embarrassment, so he leaned over and explained, “He can’t run because he got four balls.” The Scotsman immediately stood up and screamed, “Walk with pride, man! Walk with pride!”
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has 73.02 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: game, sport, time
At the airport for a business trip, I settled down to wait for the boarding announcement at Gate 35. Then I heard the voice on the public address system saying, "We apologize for the inconvenience, but Delta Flight 570 will board from Gate 41." So my family picked up our luggage and carried it over to Gate 41. Not ten minutes later the public address voice told us that Flight 570 would in fact be boarding from Gate 35. So, again, we gathered our carry-on luggage and returned to the original gate. Just as we were settling down, the public address voice spoke again: "Thank you for participating in Delta's physical fitness program."
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has 72.95 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: sport
My wife said, "I can think of 14 reasons to leave you, plus your obsession with Tennis!" I replied, "That's 15 love!"
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has 72.95 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: marriage, sport, wife
Q: Where is the first baseball game in the Bible? A: In the big inning. Eve stole first, Adam stole second. Cain struck out Abel. The Giants and the Angels were rained out.
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has 72.92 % from 75 votes. More jokes about: bible, catholic, sport
Q: What sports team is the least safe around children? A: The Nashville Predators.
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has 72.56 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: kids, sport
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