The best jokes about women

At the scene of a terrible road accident, a guy is laying sprawled out on the road, seemingly stone dead. The rescue workers are all around him, but can do nothing to resuscitate him. Suddenly, a young woman in a short miniskirt forces her way through the crowd. "Let me at him, I can help him," she says. "What can you do?" ask the rescue people. "We've tried everything to revive him, and it's too late." "I can," says the woman. "Stand back!" And she promptly takes off her panties, and crouches with her crotch over the man's face. Suddenly, the man coughs, splutters, and sits up. "What did you do?" ask the rescue people, amazed. The woman says, "Blood Transfusion."
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More jokes about: death, disgusting, women
I unfollowed Taylor Swift on Twitter... I'm sure she's gonna write a song about it.
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How can you tell a sumo wrestler from a feminist? A Sumo wrestler shaves his legs.
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Q: Why do women wear black underwear? A: They are mourning for the stiff they buried the night before.
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More jokes about: women
Boy: "Hey baby, what's your sign?" Girl: "Do Not Enter!"
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More jokes about: flirt, mean, men, women
A woman finds out that her husband is cheating on her, so she decides to leave him a present. When he gets home, he finds an empty house, a bowl of cookies, and a video. He scarfs down the cookies, and pops in the video. On TV, he sees his wife sucking his best friend's d**k. He comes in her mouth, and she immediately spits the jizz into a bowl of cookie dough. Then she turns to the camera. "Oh, hello, I want a divorce."
Vote: has 70.02 % from 39 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, divorce, food, husband, women
Oscar drove his brand new Mercedes to his favorite sporting goods store. He parked it outside and went in to do a little perusing with Jan, his regular sales woman. Jan was a pretty blonde, and as Oscar walked into the store, she happily greeted him. But he requested to look around alone today before he needed her help. She obliged and let him do his thing. Five minutes later, Jan came running up to him yelling, “Oscar! Oscar! I just saw someone driving off with your new Mercedes!” “Dear God! Did you try to stop him?” “No,” she said, “I did better than that! I got the license plate number!”
Vote: has 70.01 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, car, god, women
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t want.
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More jokes about: women
Women prefer the simple things in life… like men.
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More jokes about: life, men, women
I like my girl to be Hannah on the streets but Miley in the sheets.
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More jokes about: celebrity, life, music, women