The best jokes about women

A guy dials his home phone number from work. A strange woman answers. The guy says, "Who is this?" "This is the maid," answered the woman. "We don’t have a maid!" "I was just hired this morning by the lady of the house." "Well, this is her husband. Is she there?" "Ummm…she’s upstairs in the bedroom with someone who I just figured was her husband." The guy is fuming. He says to the maid, "Listen, would you like to make $50,000?" "What do I have to do?" "I want you to get my gun from my desk in the den and shoot that witch and the jerk she’s with." The maid puts down the phone. The guy hears footsteps, followed by a couple of gunshots. The maid comes back to the phone. "What should I do with the bodies?" "Throw them in the swimming pool!" "What pool?”" "Uh.. is this 832-4173?"
Vote:
has 43.43 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: money, phone, women, work
What do you call an open can of tuna in a lesbians apartment? Potpourri.
Vote:
has 43.26 % from 74 votes. More jokes about: food, lesbian, women
What’s the difference between goats and women?? Goats are always horney.
Vote:
has 42.61 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal, women
Q: How do you fix a woman's watch? A: You don't...there's a clock on the oven!
Vote:
has 42.61 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: women
Whats six inches long, has a head on it and drives women wild ? A fifty pound note !
Vote:
has 42.61 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: women
How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.
Vote:
has 42.25 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: women
Think of the hottest woman. Chuck Norris did her.
Vote:
has 42.19 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: beauty, Chuck Norris, sex, women
Why do men like smart women? Opposites attract.
Vote:
has 42.03 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: men, women
If tinder has taught me one thing it's that there is an extraordinary amount of single girls named Shelby that love to ride horses
Vote:
has 42.00 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: horse, internet, single, women
What would a computer geek is going to do after seeing a beautiful woman? "Immediately start downloading it."
Vote:
has 41.94 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: beauty, geek, IT, women
<<<55565758
More jokes →
Page 55 of 65.