The best jokes about women

This black woman was vastly overweight, and I mean MASSIVE and she went to see the doctor about her weight. She said to him, "Have you got any dieting remedies or anything that can help me loose weight?" The doctor replies, "Yes we do, all you need to do is shake your head from left too right, simple eh?!" She says, "WOW that's amazing, um... when do I do it?" The doctor says, "Next time your ordered food."
Vote: has 34.72 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

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A young woman was having a physical examination and was very embarrassed because of a weight problem. As she removed her last bit of clothing, she blushed. "I'm so ashamed, and dirty Doctor," she said, "I guess I let myself go." The physician was checking hers eyes and ears. "Don't feel ashamed, Miss. You don't look that bad." "Do you really think so, Doctor?" she asked. The doctor held a tongue depressor in front of her face and said, "Of course. Now just open your mouth and say moo."
Vote: has 34.12 % from 69 votes. Send joke:

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How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.
Vote: has 34.09 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

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Q: What do women and cats have in common? A: Pussy farts.
Vote: has 33.88 % from 54 votes. Send joke:

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Q: Why do women have tiny feet? A: So they can stand closer to the sink.
Vote: has 33.50 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

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Why do women always fart only when they go to the bathroom? They have to blow dry—and there's nothing to shake.
Vote: has 33.37 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

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Question: What do you call a woman who has lost 95 percent of her intelligence? Answer: Divorced.
Vote: has 32.79 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

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Question: What’s the difference between a woman with PMS and a pit bull? Answer: Lipstick.
Vote: has 32.54 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.
Vote: has 31.97 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

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Q: Why do women have smaller feet than men? A: So they can stand closer to the sink.
Vote: has 31.89 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women