The best jokes about women

Why is psychoanalysis a lot quicker for men than for women? When it's time to go back to his childhood, he's already there.
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has 39.64 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: men, women
A traffic Policeman recently stopped a woman for exceeding the posted speed limit. He asked the driver her name. She said, "I'm Mrs. Chadivaler Zuminskagia Ragretumunga from the Republic of Uzbetikan visiting my daughter in Columbia." As she finished speaking the cop paused for a moment and then put away his summons book and pen, and said, "Well... OK... but don't let me catch you speeding again."
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: cop, women
Why do men like smart women? Opposites attract.
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has 39.39 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: men, women
Chuck Norris impregnates women without having sex with them.
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has 39.38 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, dirty, sex, women
Prospective husband: Do you have a book called "Man, The Master of Womem"? Salesgirl: The fiction department is on the other side, sir.
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has 39.32 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: men, women
Question: How many men does it take to open a beer? Answer: None. It should already be open by the time she brings it.
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has 39.21 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: beer, women
One day there was a woman who lost her cat named "LOVE." It was pretty dark outside and she lived in New York. So, thinking that he might be down the street, she put on her house-coat and went looking for him. When a police officer stopped to ask what she was doing, she said very honestly, "I'm looking for LOVE." The policeman arrested her on the spot.
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has 38.22 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal, cat, cop, women
Five men and one woman wash up on a desert island after a shipwreck. Before long they are all getting pretty horny so they all make a deal. Each man will marry the woman for one week at a time, at which point the next man in line will marry her and so on. All the men get sex every five weeks and the woman gets sex as often as she wants with a different man each week. The situation works wonderfully for five years. When the woman suddenly dies... The first week after wasn't too bad. The second week was geting sort of bad. The third week was getting pretty bad. The fourth week was really bad. The fifth week was horrible! By the sixth week it was unbearable... so they buried her.
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has 38.00 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: desert island, disgusting, marriage, time, women
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you already told her twice.
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has 37.95 % from 105 votes. More jokes about: dirty, women
A blonde is on holiday and she wallks into an internet cafe to send an e-mail to her mum in America. She doesn't know how to work the computers so she goes up to the guy on the desk and says: "Excuse me could you help me send an e-mail to my mum?" The guy says "Yeh, but it will cost ya" And the blonde says "Sure i'll do anything for my mum" The guy says: "In that case follow me" So she follows him into the back room and he pushes her down onto her knees, he unzips his trousers and pulls down his boxers and says: "Well go on then you said you'd do anything!" So she picks up his dick, holds it to her mouth and says: "Hello.........mum are you there?"
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has 37.92 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: blonde, phone, technology, women
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