A man goes into a bank and asks the cashier to check his balance, so the cashier pushes him over.
What’s the difference between a pigeon and a tramp?
The pigeon can put a deposit on a Porsche.
Yo momma’s so fat, her chairs have seat belts.
Yo momma’s so ugly, her dentist treats her by mail order.
All I ask for is the opportunity to prove that money doesn’t buy happiness...All most people want is a chance to prove money can’t make them happy.
I drink so much alcohol I’m afraid to smoke.
Warning: Consumption of alcohol may actually cause pregnancy.
If women knew what men were really thinking, they'd never stop slapping them.
Chuck Norris broke the world record for most punches in a minute with one roundhouse kick.
Vote:
Doctor doctor I feel that Im a pack of card. What can I do ?
Doctor: I deal with you later.