Q: What's long and hard on a blackman?
A: The first grade. 
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Q: Why does Michael Jackson like twenty five-year-olds?
A: Because there are twenty of them!
Whats the difference between a jew camp and a summer camp?
The kids come back.
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Why do nigger's have nightmares?
Because the last one that had a dream got shot.
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What are the 3 things you cannot give a black guy?
A fat lip, a black eye, or a job.
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Q: Why are black ladies pocket books so big?
A: They have to put their lipstick some where.
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An English professor complained to the pet shop proprietor, “The parrot I purchased uses improper language.”
“I’m surprised,” said the owner.
“I’ve never taught that bird to swear.”
“Oh, it isn’t that,” explained the professor.
“But yesterday I heard him split an infinitive.”
Why are contipated folks unkind and rude?
Cause they don't give a crap!
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What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhea?
A salad shooter.
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"Where are you going to take Vampira on your date?" asked one vampire.
"Oh, I thought we'd go to the movies, and then get a quick bite."
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