What comes after 69? Mouthwash.
How long does it take a black lady to shit? About 9 months.
James Bond got this email from a friend: CanYouPleaseFixTheSpaceBarOnMyKeyboard?
One day three blondes were walking along and came upon a raging, violent river. They needed to get to the other side, but had no idea of how to do it. The first blonde prayed to god saying, "Please god, give me the strength to cross this river." Poof! God gave her big arms and strong legs, and she was able to swim across the river in about two hours. Seeing this the second blonde prayed to god saying, "Please god, give me the strength and ability to cross this river." Poof! God gave her a rowboat and she was able to row across the river in about three hours. The third blond had seen how this worked out for the other two, so she also prayed to god saying, "please god, give me the strength, ability, and intelligence to cross this river." And Poof! God turned her into a man. He looked at the map, then walked upstream and across the bridge.
Yo momma’s so stupid, she took the Pepsi challenge and chose Cif.
Did you hear about the new contraceptive pill for men? You put it in your shoe and it makes you limp.
There's something actionable in your pants.
How do you know if your wife wears tights in bed? Her toes curl up when you screw her.
I've some bread dough in my pants. Wanna see if it rises?
Yo momma’s so fat, she stood in front of the Hollywood sign and it just said H —— d.