Why did a gambler scare everyone out swimming? He was a card shark.
What do you call the everyday routines of rabbits? Rabbits habits.
Chuck Norris' keyboad has no delete key. Chuck Norris never makes a mistake!
What do you call a group of cattle sent into orbit? The first herd shot round the world.
The goal of life is living in agreement with Chuck Norris.
Which day of the week do chickens hate most? Fry-day!
How many men does it take to screw a light bulb? A. One - men will screw anything. B. One - men will screw up anything. C. Five - one to actually do the screwing, four to listen to him brag about it.
Scientis cannot figure out where Atlantis is... Chuck Norris owns a villa there.
Friend: your racist me: i'm not racist because racisms a crime and crime is for black people.
A teacher asked a student to write 55. Student asked: How? Teacher: Write 5 and beside it another 5! The student wrote 5 and stopped. Teacher: What are you waiting for? Student: I don't know which side to write the other 5!