Yo mama so stupid that when I was drowning I yelled out to her that I needed a life saver and she said "Cherry or grape?"
How did they know that the driver had dandruff?
They found his head and shoulders in the glove box.
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What did the PENCIL say to the SHARPENER? STOP GOING IN CIRCLES AND GET TO THE POINT
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The boss snubs his employee because he took a flashlight with him to a date: "What kind of crap happens nowadays? When I was in your age, I wasn’t carrying any flashlight with me on a date. I was always meeting my girlfriends in the dark."
"And what did that got you... Take a look at what you’ve married in to!"
Did you hear about the blonde who after watching the ballerinas, wondered why they didn't get taller girls?
Q: How many nurses does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. They just have a nursing student do it.
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Chuck Norris once killed a man in New York while practicing Bruce Lee's one inch punch...
Chuck Norris was in San Franscisco at the time.
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Yo mama so fat when she went to outer space NASA thought they discovered a new planet.
What's the only thing white girls swallow?
Starbucks.
Yo' Mama is so redneck, the door mat to her trailer home doubles as a mad flap for her pick up truck.