"How are your hemorrhoids?"
"Swell." 
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Yo' Mama is so hairy, she has to part the hair on her butt to go to the bathroom.
Yo' Mama is so ugly, her face looks like a horse's ass flapping in the breeze.
Yo' Mama is so ugly, the only difference between her face and a bag of crap is the bag.
When Chuck Norris punches someone in the stomach they get hit in the back of the head.
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Yo' Mama is so stupid, she thinks her binoculars are opera glasses.
A watched kettle never boils... unless Chuck Norris is doing the watching, in which case it explodes.
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How can you tell a rabbit from a skunk?
A skunk uses a cheaper deodorant.
Did you hear about the skunk who sat on a fan?
He got cut off without a scent.
Chuck Norris can wipe rainwater from inside his car.
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