Yo' Mama is so ugly, the only difference between her face and a bag of crap is the bag.
When Chuck Norris punches someone in the stomach they get hit in the back of the head.
Vote:
Yo' Mama is so stupid, she thinks her binoculars are opera glasses.
A watched kettle never boils... unless Chuck Norris is doing the watching, in which case it explodes.
Vote:
Q: What does a plumber need to know about his job?
A: Sh*t runs downhill and payday is on Friday.
Vote:
"How are your hemorrhoids?"
"Swell."
Vote:
The Tower of Pisa was in Chuck Norris' way.
Vote:
Chuck Norris once ran in a movie marathon.... and won.
Vote:
What country do cows love to visit?
Moo Zealand.
Where do Danish cows come from?
Cowpenhagenf.