My tomcat used to stay out all night, so I took him to the vet and had him neutered.
Now he still stays out all night – it turns out he likes to watch!
Yo momma’s so ugly, when she takes her bra off she looks like she has four big toes.
Getting money out of my father was like taking candy from a baby.
He used to scream and cry like hell.
Yo Mama so old...
She's got the first autographed Koran.
If women knew what men were really thinking, they'd never stop slapping them.
Yo' Mama is so uptight, you need the jaws of life to part her legs.
Yo' Mama is so fat, yo' daddy needs a Sherpa to help get him on top.
Yo' Mama is so ugly, she's going to be in trouble when the baboon wants its ass back.
Chuck Norris created the Grand Canyon because he coughed "Just Once".
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Q: What did Jeffrey Dahmer do after dumping his boyfriend?
A: He wiped.
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