When God said "Let there be light!", Chuck Norris said "Only for half the day."
Chuck Norris lights campfires with fire ants.
Chuck Norris' Facebook status has a dislike button...nobody clicks it.
When Clark Kent goes into a phonebooth, Superman comes out. When Chuck Norris goes into a phone booth, it explodes and Chuck walks away.
Chuck Norris can hear his phone ring on silent.
Chuck Norris once squeezed an M&M so hard that it turned into a Skittle.
Chuck Norris dropped an apple once, and gravity was born.
Chuck Norris can whistle in five different languages, including sign language.
Chuck Norris can stab a knife with a man.
The only reason Osama Bin Laden is dead is because they finally let Chuck Norris into Pakistan...
Chuck Norris has the right to keep and arm bears.