Chuck Norris can do a downward uppercut.
What do you call a dinosaur that destroys everything in its path? Tyrannosaurus Wrecks.
Q: What do you call an empty jar of Cheez Whiz? A: Cheez Whuz.
Yo momma so fat it's not even funny anymore.
Using a credit card is a convenient way to spend money you wish you had.
If God had meant us to pay taxes, he’d have made us smart enough to fill in the return form.
Women dream of world peace, a safe environment, and eliminating hunger. What do men dream of? Being stuck in an elevator with the Doublemint twins.
Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.
Did you here about the man that died from eating Rocky Mountain Oysters? The bull must have drug him a mile!
Yo mama is so fat Jesus can't hold her holy spirit.