Chuck Norris was an only child.
Eventually.
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Q: What is 40 feet long and smells like urine?
A: Line dancing at a nursing home.
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What do you get when you cross Billy Ray Cyrus with a yeast infection?
An itchy, twitchy twat!
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Did you hear about Ku Klux Kineivals latest stunt?
He is going to try to jump 50 niggers with a steam roller.
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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth?
With a blender.
How do you get them out?
Nachos - make a dipping and snacking motion.
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A gay American was caught by his Filipino gay husband cheating.
The American husband asked, "how did you find out?"
The Filipino husband replied, "through my Western Union Receipts."
Chuck Norris doesn't do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts.
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To run away from Chuck Norris man invented a car, then to catch them Chuck Norris invented crashes.
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Chuck Norris cancelled his own funeral.
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A woman came to his doctor with a left knee that was shot through.
The doctor asked her: "What does it mean? Why did you shoot accurately your left knee?"
The woman tells him only: "Sorry, but, you doctor, have told me that the heart is located two thumbs under my left breast."
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