Best jokes ever

When Chuck Norris was a kid his parents took him to a beach in Georgia. While swimming Chuck Norris pants came down and out popped Florida.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, kids
Did you hear about Mike Tyson's horse? It got angry and bit at the champ!
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More jokes about: animal, celebrity, sport
My grandfather always said, "Don't watch your money; watch your health." So one day while I was watching my health, someone stole my money. It was my grandfather.
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More jokes about: old people
A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, wherever I touch, it hurts." The doctor asks, "What do you mean?" The man says, "When I touch my shoulder, it really hurts. If I touch my knee - OUCH! When I touch my forehead, it really, really hurts." The doctor says, "I know what's wrong with you. You've broken your finger!"
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More jokes about: men
A man walks into a New York City bank and says he wants to borrow $2,000 for three weeks. The loan officer asks him what kind of collateral he has. The man says "I've got a Rolls Royce -- keep it until the loan is paid off -- here are the keys." The loan officer promptly has the car driven into the bank's underground parking for safe keeping, and gives the man $2,000. Three weeks later the man comes into the bank, pays back the $2,000 loan, plus $10 interest, and regains possession of the Rolls Royce. The loan officer asks him, "Sir, if I may ask, why would a man who drives a Rolls Royce need to borrow two thousand dollars?" The man answers, "I had to go to Europe for three weeks, and where else could I store a Rolls Royce for that long for ten dollars?"
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More jokes about: money
Yo mamma so stupid she puts a piece of paper on the TV and says, "I'm watching paper-view."
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More jokes about: stupid, technology, Yo mama
You said it was a great horse and it is. It took twenty other horses to beat him!
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More jokes about: animal
Why was Teddy Roosevelt mean to horses? He was a rough rider!
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More jokes about: animal, celebrity
Did you hear about the argumentative skunk? He always liked to make a stink.
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More jokes about: animal
Why do elephants squirt water through their noses? If they squirted it through their tails, it'd be very difficult to aim.
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More jokes about: animal


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