Chuck Norris doesn't need photos, he takes mental pictures.
The Expendables 2 is actually a documentary film showing Chuck Norris killing people.
July 4th is Independence day. And the day Chuck Norris was born. Coincidence? I think not.
Chuck Norris did 5 successful suicide bomb missions
Chuck Norris had never escape from jail. Jail escapes from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once round house kicked a bear while on a survival trek in Siberia. That incident was known as the Tunguska event.
Chuck Norris can play the violin with a piano.
Chuck Norris can win at solitaire with only 18 cards.
Chuck Norris put humpty dumpty back together again, only to roundhouse kick him in the face. Later Chuck dined on scrambled eggs with all the king's horses and all the king's men. The king himself could not attend for unspecified reasons. Coincidentally, the autopsoy revealed the cause of death to be a roundhouse kick to the face. There is only one King.
Chuck Norris doesn't blink...reality pauses.