How are women and linoleum floors alike?
You lay them right the first time and you can walk all over them for the next 20 years.
Chuck Norris can make a Java Program in visual studio 2010.
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A bulletproof vest wears Chuck Norris for protection.
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Chuck Norris once gave a man the Hiemlich Manuever.
That man still holds the record for most bones broken.
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Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a tadpole and turned it into a frog, then he kicked it again and it died.
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Yo mama so fat when you have sex with her you have to slap her stomach and ride the wave in.
The world did not have a tilt in its axis until Chuck Norris stubbed his toe on the North Pole.
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Yo mammas so fat they had to make a new number.
Chuck Norris can strike the same lightning twice.
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One day Chuck Norris went into Wal Mart.
The clerk told him to have a nice day.
The next day the clerk was found dead.
The police asked Chuck Norris if he killed her and he said yes so they asked him why.
He said " Nobody tells Chuck Norris what to do"
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