Chuck Norris flew boats in the Vietnam War.
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The song Santa Claus is Coming To Town was originaly called Chuck Norris is Coming To Town.
They changed it so the children wouldn't live in fear.
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Iran reveals a plan to test its first Chuck Norris within a week.
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Only Chuck Norris knows a bigger number than infinity, and it's not infinite plus one.
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What do you call a black guy selling drugs?
A pharmacist.
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Q: Did you hear about the Mexican that went to college?
A: Neither did I.
Why does a man like love at first sight?
It saves them a lot of time.
Adam and Eve virus: Takes a couple of bytes out of your Apple.
Airline virus: You're in Dallas, but your data is in Singapore.
Anita Hill virus: Lies dormant for ten years.
Arnold Schwarzenegger virus: Terminates and stays resident. It'll be back.
AT&T virus: Every three minutes it tells you what great service you are getting.
Q: Why is it so hot at Phillies games?
A: Because there's not a fan in the place.