When Chuck Norris goes to the gym the treadmill sweats.
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The housing market crashed because Chuck thought he was paying too much property tax.
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Charlie Sheen can achieve recovery by taking a drug called Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once went to Stevie Wonders concerts and smiled at him; Stevie Wonder is now blind.
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Yo momma's so old she knew the Virgin Mary when she was 10 and said Lil Mary will never amount to anything.
A woman is divorcing her husband on the grounds of cruelty.
His organ is so large it hurts her to have sex.
After she has explained her problem to a lawyer, he tells her that he’ll file her petition.
‘Stuff that!’ says the woman.
‘Why can’t you go round and sandpaper his down a bit.’
Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.
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Q: What do you use when white people tell you to erase their history?
A: White out.
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Chuck Norris hit a home run in a football game.
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Scientists don't bother to calculate how many years old the planet earth is, they just say it's one Chuck old.
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